Finishing out the equation...

So, what good would I be without a proper hag? I mean, I may only be a few months into being able to tell myself that I like boys (which by the way, I really, REALLY do...), but I've read enough of my little sister's Seventeen magazines to know that even gay guys need a vagina. I've got a great one.

Fortunately for me, my best girl friend for the last six years has a reputation in our home town of being a fagmaker. We've spent the last six years co-counseling ALL of our friends as they've come out to us (good god they put something in the water in that little town!)... Anyway, its only fitting that after all of the queers we've been there for, I've now totally claimed her as my own.

So lets do the math:
(1) Listens to Rufus Wainright/Scissor Sisters (2) cleans room in tights and a dance belt (3) owns Beaches Soundtrack (4) calls football practice "football rehearsal" (5) has a hag....

It all adds up to a disco-dancing, Oscar Wilde-reading, Streisand ticket-holding, friend of Dorothy...