Missing My Vagina...

So, my Hag/Honey/Female-Other-Half has been in Alaska visiting her b/f, who works there. Unless she calls me from a satellite phone, there's really no way for us to talk. Since she lives 2200 miles away from me, I'm used to not seeing her, but this complete lack of communication is a bitch.

Anyone know any homo honeys that wouldn't mind filling in for awhile? My Vagina seems to be too busy for me...

;-(