A Gay Cop is a Better Cop....for me, anyway...

So, I got another speeding ticket. I swear. 7mph over the limit and I get a bloody ticket. I talked to a female coworker when I got back to the office, and it's totally true. Good looking women can get out of any ticket. She told me about a time when she was driving her mom's new Infinity and got pulled over for running a stop sign in a residential zone while speeding. The cop asked her what PERFUME SHE WAS WEARING! Damn. And if the cop was a chick, she'd either be a lesbian who also asked about the perfume or a feminazi who wouldn't dream of penalizing a woman in a man's world!

Meanwhile, I get a ticket for 7mph.

Okay, so I've never pretended to be the hottest piece of ass in the world, but I'm pretty sure if I got pulled over by a gay cop, I look good enough that I could get out of the ticket. Honestly, bat the eyes, flick the wrist, giggle a little bit...done. I think we should campaign for more gays on the force. More guys in uniform and a better chance the gays could avoid dings to their driving record. Where's Vince when you need him...